September 2008 Kukai Dear Haiku Friends, Here are the results for the September 2008 Kukai, wherein our Kigo subject was "Autumn" and our Free Format subject was "Rock or Stone". Congratulations to April Serock, winner of our Kigo section and to Devika Menon, winner of our Free Format section! The haiku are listed in order of total points received from voters. The numbers reflect the number of voters who gave the haiku either three points, two points, or one point -- followed by the total points for all votes. Those who were given less than three points and who requested anonymity in such a case are so noted. In the listing below, after each poem the author is listed, and then a three digit code revealing how many 3-point, 2-point, and 1-point points were cast for this poem by the other participating poets. (214 = 12) would indicate that the poem above received two 3-point votes, one 2-point vote, and four 1-point votes. Voters comments are in italics below the respective poems. September 2008 Results Kigo Theme: Autumn Free Format Theme: Rock or Stone First Place – Twenty-eight Points autumn the sky grows bigger by one leaf April Serock (2,5,12) = 28 Pts A beauty. Something we've all experienced but this makes me feel that I'm seeing it for the first time. A nice shift of perspective. Second Place – Twenty-four Points autumn . . . a spider takes over the watering can sheila windsor (1,5,11) = 24 Pts Third Place – Nineteen Points autumn chill — the church fills with the smell of mothballs Jacek M (2,2,9) = 19 Pts autumn breeze a dragonfly skims sunlight off the pond Keiko Izawa (1,5,6) = 19 Pts a field of faceless pumpkins... Autumn begins ed markowski (0,3,13) = 19 Pts I like that phrase, 'faceless pumpkins', for Jack O' Lanterns-to-be. Fourth Place – Seventeen Points autumn dusk an old man bends to the earth Melissa Spurr (0,5,7) = 17 Pts Fifth Place – Sixteen Points autumn trees undressing leaf by leaf Frances McCarthy (0,5,6) = 16 Pts An interesting reversal. Sixth Place – Fourteen Points autumn evening a phone call from the friend who lives alone Bill Kenney (0,2,10) = 14 Pts Simultaneously brings to mind the coziness of friendship and the cool shiver of loneliness. Seventh Place – Twelve Points late autumn a lone aspen leaf resists the wind Warren Gossett (0,3,6) = 12 Pts I like the word resist used here. Eighth Place – Eleven Points leaves raked a boy jumps into autumn Roberta Beary (1,1,6) = 11 Pts I love this image. It's full of life - a timeless story, beautifully told. So well crafted... just seven words yet rich in image and motion. lazy river a few poplar leaves drift toward autumn polona (0,2,7) = 11 Pts A beauty. Something we've all experienced but this makes me feel that I'm seeing it for the first time. Ah . . . such a gentle poem. Lazy and drift . . . wonderful. Ninth Place – Ten Points autumn dawn a chimney belches its swifts Barbara Snow (1,3,1) = 10 Pts a granddaughter leads her through the corn maze autumn deepens tom painting (0,3,4) = 10 Pts autumn rain — a tattooed man sells permanent markers Israel Lopez Balan (0,3,4) = 10 Pts autumn lingers my father's coat still smells like him Earl Keener (0,3,4) = 10 Pts Tenth Place – Nine Points crisp autumn morning a deer sips at the blue lake — artist paint is dry Rebecca S. (1,2,2) = 9 Pts morning fog and faint light from the bakery early autumn Boris Nazansky (1,2,2) = 9 Pts autumn fields a few wisps of mist in the stubble Jan O'Loughlin (0,1,7) = 9 Pts autumn night we lose ourselves in the corn maze Beth Powell (0,1,7) = 9 Pts Hadn't heard of 'corn maze' before. Interesting concept and a well formed haiku. Autumn evening the hoot owl tires of answering me Terri L. French (0,0,9) = 9 Pts Serene, almost teased sentiment, making the best of the last few moments of summer. The dependable call-and-response breaking down... feels very autumnal. Eleventh Place – Eight Points Dad's wedding ring begins to loosen . . . autumn rain Alice Frampton (0,2,4) = 8 Pts autumn sunshine: she finds a dime in the grass Raquel Bailey (0,2,4) = 8 Pts early autumn rain the darkening beach all mine Jon Baldwin (0,1,6) = 8 Pts autumn air the koi fish rise in my shadow Harvey Jenkins (0,1,6) = 8 Pts Twelfth Place – Seven Points like an autumn leaf first night in my new flat even the moon has moved Hermione (1,2,0) = 7 Pts I love this unusual comparison. for a pinch of grain koi splatter the pond in autumn colors Michael McClintock (0,2,3) = 7 Pts more rain and a kitchen cricket — autumn songs Shelley Krause (0,2,3) = 7 Pts There is something cozy about these sounds. Love the combination of sounds in this one and the contrast of the wet/dry imagery. autumn walk — in a colourful forest a grey couple max verhart (0,0,7) = 7 Pts long autumn evening the musty smell of old book Dorota Pyra (0,0,7) = 7 Pts Thirteenth Place – Six Points the bell buoy barely a silhouette — august fog Carol Raisfeld (0,2,2) = 6 Pts You can feel the ocean cool. I opened the door and autumn blew rain in my face helge t. (0,2,2) = 6 Pts no autumn yet this autumn Robert Ertman (0,1,4) = 6 Pts This one was the one I felt compelled to read aloud to my partner, and the one that stayed with me all week. words unspoken in the chillness of the evening autumn leaves Fred Flohr (0,1,4,) = 6 Pts Autumn rain — the smell of trees turning Marylouise Knight (0,1,4) = 6 Pts autumn equinox — we agree to split the child support Mauree Pendergrast (0,1,4) = 6 Pts Fourteenth Place – Five Points ripe peaches and six geese overhead ...autumn rising Jeff Hanson (0,2,1) = 5 Pts these autumn mountains — even a ghost would leave prints... Kurt R. W. (0,1,3) = 5 Pts unfolding autumn — a stray cat quietly sits at the front door Origa (0,1,3) = 5 Pts autumn equinox shadows slant from the trees at new angles Catherine J.S. Lee (0,1,3) = 5 Pts Fifteenth Place – Four Points a long drive — autumn leaves in hot pursuit Sunil Uniyal (0,2,0) = 4 Pts now in a small box the ring that hugged my finger — Autumn came too soon Betty Kaplan (0,1,2) = 4 Pts tumbling down the mountainside tie-dye autumn Darrell Lindsey (0,1,2) = 4 Pts Autumn passing — Last leaf on a bare tree Captured by the wind James Sawers (0,2,0) = 4 Pts autumn wind — the lower clouds outrun the higher ones Isabelle Prondzynski (0,0,4) = 4 Pts autumn sun a rainbow ... no, two og_a (0,1,2) = 4 Pts A perfectly caught moment. another argument ~ a dry autumn leaf rolled up tight Paul Hodder (0,0,4) = 4 Pts The spirit becomes weary of conflict. We close ourselves off even when doing so might portend a sort of psychic falling and death, what the alchemists call negredo. In the long run closing off may also lead to spring, a psychic rebirth. turkey feathers on grandma's hat autumn funeral Meggy (0,1,2) = 4 Pts so much season in the reedy voice of the cricket Paul O. Williams (0,1,2) = 4 Pts waltzing golden birch in autumn evening dress starry night jewels Jon Espen Vassbotn (1,0,1) = 4 Pts in the space between summer and autumn purple flowers carol pearce-worthington (0,0,4) = 4 Pts morning haze a seaplane lifts into autumn Susan Constable (0,0,4) = 4 Pts the silence in the shadows autumn dusk Sjs (0,1,2) = 4 Pts autumn dampness the deep-fried scent of the tavern Jennifer Corpe (0,0,4) = 4 Pts autumn freight cold rails groan louder in the dark ruthanne (0,1,2) = 4 Pts Autumn fading colors of leaves nothing but naked trees Watpliwy (1,0,1) = 4 Pts Sixteenth Place – Three Points autumn colours — do you remember our first kiss? Daniela Bullas (0,1,1) = 3 Pts Autumn is my life. Not quite spring, not quite summer. But never winter. Tanja Cilia (0,1,1) = 3 Pts Autumn rain picking colors from the tree I color my hair Ben Gieske (0,0,3) = 3 Pts I feel autumn even in the kiss: a cold nose and warm lips Tomislav M. (1,0,0) = 3 Pts All is dwindling Shorter days...and years Autumn closes in Mary E. Gray (0,1,1) = 3 Pts autistic woman . . . autumn comes hard in spite of her song Bill Pauly (0,1,1) = 3 Pts autumn morn a loon calls across the placid lake Meredith Cavalieri (0,0,3) = 3 Pts autumn chill the young geese try out running on water Marlθne Buitelaar (0,1,1) = 3 Pts deep into autumn browsing through online albums to keep the room warm Cristian Mocanu (0,0,3) = 3 Pts doe prints where she stopped for an autumn wind Dan Schwerin (1,0,0) = 3 Pts First Place – Twenty-five Points drought year — only the shape of water on the stones Devika (0,7,11) = 25 Pts Nicely captures the way we seek water ceaselessly during a drought. Second Place – Twenty-two Points family dog the weight of the stones upon his grave Melissa Spurr (1,5,9) = 22 Pts Simply stated, but says all that it needs to. Third Place – Eighteen Points endless night — between the stepping stones the other half of the moon Elena Naskova (3,3,3) = 18 Pts A bit of a puzzle as to exactly what I'm seeing, but the atmosphere wins my vote. Fourth Place – Fifteen Points graveside the comfort of a smooth pebble Paul Hodder (0,3,9) = 15 Pts Fifth Place – Thirteen Points worn soft by the movement of time the heart of stone Bill Hudson (1,4,2) = 13 Pts Sixth Place – Twelve Points filling the hole in my path a stepping stone Josh Wikoff (1,2,5) = 12 Pts Seventh Place – Eleven Points mountain brook — a wagtail advances stone by stone Isabelle Prondzynski (1,1,6) = 11 Pts tinder and flint stone all I have under the moon and this loneliness... Cristian Mocanu (0,4,3) = 11 Pts Eighth Place – Ten Points foggy night a new opal on my finger Meggy (1,3,1) = 10 Pts weathered granite — just a few letters Dorota Pyra (0,3,4) = 10 Pts Imbued with both the certainty and mystery of death. country road deep in the deep leaves old headstones Bruce Ross (0,2,6) = 10 Pts dry river bed a fawn licks the color from a rock Susan Constable (0,2,6) = 10 Pts Ninth Place – Nine Points limestone cave our hands reach out to stalactites andrea (1,1,4) = 9 Pts moonless night the sound of a skipping stone sinking ed markowski (0,3,3) = 9 Pts Tenth Place – Eight Points pine tree standing tall how many rocks did you crush reaching for the sky todd eddy (2,1,0) = 8 Pts summer's end — driveway stones no longer sharp Shelley Krause (1,0,5) = 8 Pts Barefoot days perfectly defined. autumn wind — the marble buddha so quiet Israel Lopez Balan (0,1,6) = 8 Pts still palm warm the beach pebble you gave me Jon Baldwin (0,1,6) = 8 Pts Eleventh Place – Seven Points Here I am standing between a rock and the sea; Will I climb or swim? Tanja (0,2,3) = 7 Pts new headstone a ragged gentleman sharing his moonshine selwyn (0,1,5) = 7 Pts forevermore two spiders cavort in amber Meredith Cavalieri (0,1,5) = 7 Pts summer drought — the river rocks that holed our canoe Mike Montreuil (0,1,5) = 7 Pts This rueful realization conjures up a whole scene. Twelfth Place – Six Points hidden in limestone leopards lurk in shadows of a ruby — ARW (2,0,0) = 6 Pts my grandfather rubbing his feet with a stone — evening bath Paul Omondi (0,2,2) = 6 Pts a beach pebble only for a moment in a little hand Dejan Pavlinovic (0,2,2) = 6 Pts still pond our skipped stones ripple into sunset Catherine J.S. Lee (0,2,2) = 6 Pts crushed gravel — his mother-in-law's voice over the phone DeVar (0,1,4) = 6 Pts Although I think this would be stronger in first person, it's still very evocative. alone in a field the great stone made of moonlight Neil Moylan (0,0,6) = 6 Pts I liked the contrast of mass and light here. among the crows a scattering of apricot stones Warren Gossett (0,0,6) = 6 Pts Thirteenth Place – Five Points "John + Brad" nothing is in stone any more Origa (1,0,2) = 5 Pts Saddened by its death the child makes a grave with stones for the butterfly. Laurie A. Szpot (1,1,0) = 5 Pts Entering the brotherhood of boulders I put on a green cape Jon Espen Vassbotn (1,1,0) = 5 Pts Lovely in illustrating the process of 'going to the pine to learn about the pine'. We stop rolling and hunker down relating to the boulders beneath their moss. a pebble thrown into the mountain lake circles of the sky Tomislav M. (0,2,1) = 5 Pts funeral evening her rose-quartz angel plays with the light sheila windsor (0,1,3) = 5 Pts fall classic a boy throws stones through the tire swing tom painting (0,0,5) = 5 Pts Love the double resonance of "classic" here & the visual of the boy's throwing. flash flood the agate resumes its journey to the sea Edward (0,0,5) = 5 Pts Fourteenth Place – Four Points skipping stones father and son bonding Betty Kaplan (0,1,2) = 4 Pts third try his stone skips farther than mine Roberta Beary (0,1,2) = 4 Pts I picture a father with his son, who is growing up much too fast. rapid stream — we cross holding hands stone after stone Jeff Hanson (0,2,0) = 4 Pts the poet's choice... to skim a stone or throw a rock Laurene Post (0,1,2) = 4 Pts long day — a fishing rod attached to a stone Kelvin Mukoselo (0,1,2) = 4 Pts breakwater bird droppings cover the jagged rocks Carmel Lively Westerman (0,2,0) = 4 Pts His sharpening stone an anchor for cobwebs Yositaka (0,2,0) = 4 Pts I really admire the imagery in this haiku and it's very tight construction. The word 'anchor' for me symbolizes the stability of the world which remains in 'his' absence (for whatever reason) and which clearly (if also ephemerally) attaches the world of man to the broader world of nature. scotch over rocks songs by the stones good times gone cire (0,1,2) = 4 Pts I appreciated seeing a different kind of rock, and it has a mellow, autumnal feeling to me. meditation stone — to crickets I am just another obstacle jt (0,1,2) = 4 Pts staring at us from the rock two round spots of a butterfly john tiong chunghoo (0,1,2) = 4 Pts meadow orchids on a limestone bed an ancient road Marlθne (0,1,2) = 4 Pts This image stayed in my mind. anniversary — finding a heart-shaped stone on my path Pia Sosua (0,0,4) = 4 Pts first ray of light behind the stone cottage — a rooster raises his head jill (0,0,4) = 4 Pts a stone on the edge of rock hides an avalanche Iga (1,0,1) = 4 Pts Fifteenth Place – Three Points house of salvation colorful stained glass windows shaped like old gravestones if (0,1,1) = 3 Pts The child is soft and smells warm — he is a stone in my arms Aalix (1,0,0) = 3 Pts a cricket chirps — September equinox at Stonehenge Daniela Bullas (0,0,3) = 3 Pts mountain pass a crumbling rock cradles fossil shells polona (0,0,3) = 3 Pts night waves storm the stillness of barnacled rocks Frances McCarthy (0,0,3) = 3 Pts the stone is of natures grey — the name is yours Tina (0,1,1) = 3 Pts ornamental stone the car salesman continues to smile Harvey Jenkins (0,1,1) = 3 Pts alone again at a picnic table of stone Alice Frampton (0,0,3) = 3 Pts his name etched on a black granite wall 1bodhisattva (0,0,3) = 3 Pts So cold, so dark, so strong, so brave, so fragile, so final. my mother cooking on three-stone hearth — sooty chicken Lucy Nyambura (0,1,1) = 3 Pts I would have preferred "on a three-stone hearth" for natural rhythm; otherwise, loved it. Lovely - I think this haiku is full of heart and soul. spring! in the rock garden even the stone blooms Magdalena Banaszkiewicz (0,0,3) = 3 Pts pressed into the mud frond of an ancient palm tree fossilized in time Deirdre Godwin (0,1,1) = 3 Pts megalith tomb boulders deeply immersed in memory max verhart (1,0,0) = 3 Pts ferocious heat — now the orange and white swirled in this rock Paul O. Williams (0,1,1) = 3 Pts dry river a new pebble to my stone garden Jacek M. (0,1,1) = 3 pts museum stop — a green flint cuts through time Earl Keener (0,0,3) = 3 Pts dry creek bed . . . priest leading the boy down to the millstone Bill Pauly (0,1,1) = 3 Pts water over rocks unsung melody renaye lo (0,1,1) = 3 Pts after his death coral and turquoise litter his workbench Gene Doty (0,0,3) = 3 Pts Thank you all for participating in the September 2008 Shiki Monthly Kukai. We will be posting October's 6th Annual Poets' Choice Call for Votes on Monday, October 6th. See you then! 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